Black

There is no knight in shining armor, no fountain of elixir, no everlasting unconditional love, no paradise upon earth, no one who'd know you better than you, no one who'd ever understand. There is nothing that could comfort you on a cold moonless night, nothing that could lessen the pain of losing someone, nothing to do justice to unreciprocated love. Nothing that could last forever, nothing that could outlast pain. Nothing beyond the everexpanding darkness of the skies.


The Friendly Equation

Friend: name given to a partner in joy, accomplice in crime and aide in trouble. These wonderful creatures make life as a social being much pleasant and rewarding. You 'd dread to imagine any social scenario without friends: be it school, college, a workplace, the gym or a party..

Over the years I've been trying to understand the whole mechanism of friendship, of the imaginary 'click' and the 'will be there for you'. Foremost comes the bonding: similar interests do the trick! You go like 'hey this dude/dudette eats/watches/reads the same stuff as me!we'll get on great!'..
Or, in less fortunate cases, it may just be 'bonded by chance': like it or not, that chick is gonna be in your room for the year, better work on it!
That's about what makes it tick. Now to what keeps it on track.

Suppose that link connecting you breaks: the interests are not so common anymore, the obligation to stay/work/study together is no more there, what then?
Well its obvious most of the time we just accept the change and move on, afterall there's no shortage of potential friend material out there! Convenience is comfort. The 'will be there' becomes 'will try' and eventually just a question of 'will see'. Its baffling, isn't it?For once you would have dreamt your whole life with your friends right there with you, taking life as it comes. And then, that one thread snaps, and you tell yourself 'you've grown and the dreams have changed..'. Or something.
I have, countless many times.

But there's this one thing that immortalizes your friendship: the emotional bond. Its when you and your friend share the same ideals, the same principles, the things that make you. Its when, deep inside, there's respect and love for the other, an understanding and acceptance of the latter's nature and behavior. This is what, when you meet your friend after ages, makes you carry on from where you'd left it, effortlessly. That which gives your friend the ability to gauge your disdain behind the neutral smile,to think your thoughts with you, to communicate without speaking..

Its a lot like love. Platonic. Unconditional.

And you're lucky to have it :)


Happy Independence Day?

Lets not be fooling ourselves, its an anniversary we're merely
observing. The 63rd anniversary of the britishers leaving India.
Not an anniversary of independence.
Set free from the clutches of the British, to be caught in those of
corruption and politics, India is still not free to make any decision
not controlled by these factors.
Why am i being so judgemental?or you may say,sentimental?
'cuz every 'happy independence day' hurts me, forces me to think of
India, and there is a dull ache somewhere..
I'm no true patriot.I'm just an observer.
I observe ignorance,hypocrisy..

And i observe people observing the '63rd anniversary of..', and being happy about it..


Not waiting for my next Birthday.

Last night while hanging out with friends, I started lamenting the fact that my teen years were coming to an end. This was met with a sarcastic look by an older friend. Twenty is not old, he told me.

But, well, it's not young either!
And its gonna bring change with it, sooner or later.

Its not as if I'm against change, I'd welcome it; if it were in my favor. And most of the time, I am able to do that.
But there are things which I've just not been able to handle. Increased duties, for example, mean more stress and less time for whims. And then, as you grow up, the whole web of 'behaving as you're supposed to' becomes tighter. And there you go. Identity crisis. Moral crisis.

I can do with the added workload,the responsibilities, but this 'socially acceptable behaviour' is beyond my comprehension. The norms,customs and yeah, the restrictions. They change YOU. This is the reason why you'll miss childhood. As a child, you were you, free and undaunted, and all the changes that happened were like nutrition for your soul. But somewhere down the line, the spirit gets corrupted. Aliens invade.
Viral attack. And my body's reactions have been severe. Withdrawal from public life, despondency, unexplained depression..
Its not maturity that I lack.
Just courage,for the fear of losing myself makes me weak.

Self-Preservation is the art to be mastered.

Till then,I'm not looking forward to February.


A little somethin from LOTR caught my fancy.

I sit beside the fire and think
of all that i have seen,
of meadow-flowers and butterflies
in summers that have been;

Of yellow leaves and gossamer
in autumns that there were,
with morning mist and silver sun
and wind upon my hair.

I sit beside the fire and think
of how the world will be
when winter comes without a spring
that i shall ever see.

For still there are so many things
that i have never seen:
in every wood in every spring
there is a different green.

I sit beside the fire and think
of people long ago,
and people who will see a world
that i shall never know.

But all the while I sit and think
of times that were before,
I listen for returning feet
and voices at the door.



Every dog has its day. For mine, that's Everyday.

This maybe no more than a dull ramble to non dog-lovers. Even those friendlier with the canines might find it a bit too 'been there, did that'. But what the hell, i\I just have to write this!The dog wants to be on cyberspace, and since its her day..

I had my first pet at the age of five. Cindy was an extremely loyal, though lethal, Doberman. An excellent watchdog, she died of a snake bite at the age of nine.

And so arrived Her Majesty Caroline.
And thus departed Peace, for Carey is a 'new-age' dog, not your usual 'i'll-sit-by-the-door-and-bark' types, in fact, we had to teach her how to bark!

Oh yes!I'd have to be like "Come on Carey,look!stray cow on the road!Bark!Bark!Dumb Dog!!".
To which, Her Majesty gracefully cocks one ear at me, gives me The Glance, and goes back to chewing whatever she's destroying today..

And it gets stranger. Peeing all over the house,stealing potatoes from the refrigerator, tearing clothes/books/mattresses/you-name-it and chewing on whatever she sees!This one keeps us on our toes!

(though she may help us with disposing off plastic one day,chew chew chew)

Talk of security?this one once freaked out on seeing a cat!And she can't stand thunderstorms, crackers and bizarrely, baraats!

Its not like I'm regretting getting her, she has her good points too!Like trying to keep us in shape by making us chase her when she steals something. Or reminding us we have to get the floor/bedsheet cleaned by doing her daily business on it.

Dog-the-Menace!
Five and a half years in the running!

A little something for the readers:

Is your dog driving you nuts?
Making you run all over the place in this sultry weather?
Wish it would just calm down?

Switch on the Air Conditioner and watch it snooze stretched over your favorite couch.

I have a theory.
You know how the elder people always keep on complaining about the younger generation?how they're depraved and all that?(kalyug).
It might be true after all.
I mean,LOOK at the dogs this age has produced!


What does summer mean to you?

Summer. Beautiful, bright (yes, HOT too).

And as has always been since the last two decades, I'm joblessly at home.

Nothing to do. Its a wonderful thing!
Escape to your room and relish the solitude. No responsibilities, no having to please anyone, no having to rush and most importantly, no having to neglect yourself. :)

There has always been something optimistic about summer. I'll credit it to the abundance of sunlight. It's that time of the year when I can change and innovate and take risks. The time for adventure, for something out of the ordinary.
(now i realize, mummy and daddy were right with the summer-camp nonsense!)

The time to be yourself, feel the music of your soul and let it guide you to paths untreaded.

Thats what summer means to me.